It was a normal Sunday night. I was in bed with my parents. Because they are (a) impatient and (b) kinky I was hooked up to a leash that was connected to the headboard. This is because I have the top part of the bed and Pocket the bottom part. But sometimes, pre bondage, I would hear a noise, and charge at Pocket starting a fight, or, one time, knocking her right off the end of the bed like Yukon Cornelius and the Bumble.
So I get tied up, where I can go half way down the bed, and Pocket only dares to go halfway up the bed, and we have bed detente, until Sunday night when I stood up, looked to my right and saw another Brussels Griffon in the bedroom sitting on the same type of bed.
Well I could not have this. A Yorkie at the bottom of the bed is one thing but having a Griffon in a duplicate bed wearing a duplicate leash and a duplicate harness was another. And with her permanent frown and one snaggletooth it was obvious that this Griffon was mocking me.
I began to snarl at it. Mommy and Daddy told me to quiet down, that it was just my reflection. My reflection was right. A reflection of my personality in a sarcastic way that I would not stand for it.
I settled down in the bed, then poked up, and that naughty Griffon was poking her head up at me too. The &itch. I climbed on to my Daddy’s expansive belly just as the mocking Griffon climbed on her Daddy’s expansive belly. I wanted to leap at the interloper and destroy her but unfortunately I was bound to the bedpost, as was the River impersonator.
My parents kept telling me to settle down but I couldn’t stop poking my head up to see the poking doppelganger until Daddy got frustrated and put me on the floor. I ran head first into the bureau trying to get to that dog. Then I did it again, and again which caused me to stumble around.
Mommy and Daddy have lost three dogs to neurological problems and they became very worried that there was something wrong with me besides wanting to fight my own reflection. They brought me into the living room and watched me walk for awhile and determined that I was fine. They decided to put me in bed and shut out the lights but I still wouldn’t settle down because I wanted that dog in the mirror.
So, even though he hates to do it, Daddy had to take me out of the bedroom, put me on the couch, and hold me in a submissive position, which is exactly how my babies were conceived, until I calmed down.
WHen we got back in bed I spent several minutes giving Daddy a face bath which calms me down and then fell asleep curled into the same position all night exhausted. When I awoke in the morning Daddy held me up to the mirror and showed me that it was just me in the mirror.
So I promised I would not fight my reflection any longer. But I am going to get that popping Griffon someday soon.
Oh River....this is scary. I thinks we are being taken over by aliens that duplicate our bodies and growl at us. How long before they....eat us leaving their duplicate behind to torment our peeps? (And eat all our treats)
ReplyDeleteWell we agree River...no more fighting your reflection. They are just impossible. LOL. Have a wonderful Wednesday.
ReplyDeleteBest wishes Molly.
We had Poodles in the mirror too, but then when we smelled them they didn't smell Poodly at all.
ReplyDeleteSometimes Peeps just don't see the danger around us. It's up to us to protect our territory.
ReplyDeleteXXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy