Friday, July 29, 2016

Tails From Rainbow Bridge: Of Weasels and Royals

I would like to thank all members of the Tanner Brigade for having patience with the weasels who run the site that hosts our playground:  Ning.  For more than half of last weekend the site was down.  My parents submitted three tickets stating there were issues signing on TB, and Hattie’s Mom Miss Darla submitted one as well.   They answered Miss Darla and told her they could only discuss the problem with mommy (to whom they had not responded.)  Mommy asked Miss Darla to respond with mommy’s email and a request that they contact her.  The weasels did not answer.
I took control of mommy’s Facebook page and navigated to the Ning Page.  Ning’s motto is Ning:  Your brand.  Your members.  Your control.  I posted this:
“Ning. Your Brand. Your Members. Your 500: Unexpected Error.”
This inspired a post from Ning stating that several of their sites were experiencing the same problem, and it has been corrected.  If I have learned one thing dealing with Weasels, it is this:  To get a response from them public humiliation is required.
Which brings me to another publically humiliated gang of weasels:  The Royal Family.  My breed Brexited the hell out of England years ago.  The only dogs left in England are Lou ees (an exquisite dog) and Corgis.  We left because the Royal Family is not dog-friendly.
Check out this picture.
That is Prince George feeding a dog ice cream.  What the Royal Family thought was a cute picture of the little fascist sharing a cone with a dog is, according to some, a picture of careless parents letting their child poison (Poison I say!) an innocent dog.
The uncaring Windsors are roaming England in their royal carriages poisoning innocent dogs with dairy products and possibly chocolate.  (It’s hard to tell if it is a chocolate cone:  Everything in England is so pale.)
Before this, I thought a bit of ice cream was good for us dogs.  A young boy offering me a cone was an act of kindness.  But now I find out it was a Royal plot to remove every dog but Corgis from the world.
If you happen to run the Queen at your local Dairy Queen, beware!  Do not take ice cream from her.  It could be the last thing you eat.
If only Henry VII had known this.  He wouldn’t have had to kill all those wives.  He just would have had to make them a banana split.



3 comments:

  1. Henry VII killed Richard III because he couldn't find a horse; Henry VIII went on the chopping block spree. I, Bailey Beagle have my own stash of vanilla ice cream that is meted out to me on occasion. Last time I looked I was still alive and begging for more. No one seemed to mind that George was presumably sharing a dog licked ice cream cone; not that that has ever been a problem around here, but some unenlightened parents may take umbrage. Also if you notice the dog is not licking the ice cream. Perhaps he is in on the plot and agreed only to the photo shoot, but not suicide by dairy. If this were really the case, I should have been pushing up daisies long ago. I need my ice cream and don't try to pass off Frosty Paws on me. I know the difference and apparently I would rather die. I scream (woof), you scream (howl), we all scream (bark) for Ice Cream

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  2. We are sure the Corgis are behind this whole murderous plot. They are territorial little bitches and England is their territory.

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  3. Good grief, I had no idea about the ice cream plot. I agree, I bet the Corgis are behind it. LOL

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