Do you have a skin tag? A mole? A fatty tumor? Some other unsightly growth? Well here at Pocket’s Big House of Wigs we have what you need, the largest line of puppy hair extensions and weaves in the canine world.
I have contacted the finest grooming salons in America who work on the purest breeds in the world. They have gone through the hair that lands on their floor and picked out on the finest strands. Then they put them in the best cellophane bags made in the United States and sent them to the greatest transport company in the world who hired their most qualified driver to bring the best cellophane bag with the finest strands in the most highly tuned truck on the road to the most beautiful modular home in the greatest state in the most outstanding country in the world.
Quality! Quality! Quality! Now it is no longer just humans who can cover up their unsightly blemishes. We dogs can do it too, and we have an advantage because we have hair or fur all over our bodies where poor humans have miles of ugliness they can’t cover up with random hair.
Now that we have collected the finest fur and hair in all the land we are ready to help you cover up your not too hots spots. Have your Mom snip a bit of your hair or fur and put it in an envelope along with the thickness and length that you need replaced and Foley and I will use the squirrels we have hired to measure out and gnaw what you need and then we will send it to you.
Once you have your new extension or weave you are going to have to rely on your Mommy or a certified groomer to weave the hair (or fur) into yours to cover the blemish. I guarantee that no one will ever be able to see your unsightly blemishes again. (This guarantee comes with some caveats)
Do not expose the fur or hair to direct light.
Don’t get it wet.
Or feed it after midnight.