From my first day it is what I said
My parents look for new things for me to chew in bed
But I ignore it instead.
One day they asked if I liked peanut butter with bacon chunks on a bone
I do not like it
In my home
I do not like peanut butter with bacon chunks on a bone
Do your like peanut butter on an apple or a pear
I do not like peanut butter on a pear
Not here, not there, not anywhere
I do not like peanut butter on a bone
If other dogs like it
I don’t give a damn you innate drone
Would you like it on kibble
Would you share some with Ish Kabbible?
I do not like them on kibble
I would not eat them with Ish Kibbible
I do not like peanut butter on a bone
Not here, not there, not anywhere
Even if I was wearing a big uncomfortable cone
Would you lick it off an antler
Would you eat it if it allowed you to escape a panther?
Not on an antler
Not to escape a panther
Not with kibble
Not to share with Ish Kibbible
Not here, not there
Not anywhere
I would not eat peanut butter on a bone
I would not eat it to pay off a big loan
Would you eat them in a car
If they had been put with formaldehyde in a jar?
I would not in a car
Or a formaldehyde filled jar
You will like them, all dogs do
I hear it helps you go poo
I would not, could not, eat it on a pear
I would not eat it in my underwear
I would not eat it on kibble
I would not eat it with Ish Kibbible
I would not eat it in a car
I would not eat it in a formaldehyde filled jar
I would not eat it in on an antler
I would not eat it in on a panther
Say!
In the dark
In a dog park
In a dark dog park
I would not, could not
In the dark
Would you, could you, in the rain
I would not could not in the rain
Not in the dark, not to cure pain
Not in a car, not on a pear
Not in fresh pressed underwear
Not in a house, not in the park
Not with a mouse, not as a lark
I will not eat it here or there
I won’t eat it anywhere
You do not like peanut butter on a bone
I do not like it
You persistent little shit
Could you, would you for your mom
I could not, would not, even for mom
Could you, would you eat it with gum?
I would not could not in the rain
Not in the dark, not to cure pain
Not in a car, not on a pear
Not in fresh pressed underwear
Not in a house, not in the park
Not with a mouse, not as a lark
Not with my mom, not if it was gum
Not in a pit, not even a bit
I will not eat it here or there
I won’t eat it anywhere
I do not like peanut butter on a bone
Not even a bit,
you obsequious upper class twit
You do not like it
So you admit
Try it, try it
And you may
Try it and you may say
Mom,
If you let be
I will try it
And you will see
I tried just a bite
And found out I do like peanut butter on a bone
And you’re not an inane drone
I would love it on kibble
While I eat with Ish Kabbible
I would eat it on a pear
I would eat it in my underwear
I would eat them in the rain
I will say it again as a refrain
I would eat them in a car
I would eat them from a jar
I would eat it with my mom
I would swallow it if it was gum
I do like a peanut butter covered bones
Then I let out a groan
I threw up like a cyclone
And it was the last time I had a peanut butter covered bone