Friday, June 30, 2023

Nature Friday: The 100-year-old Rose Bush by Foley Monster

 There was a light rapping on my door. I climbed out of bed and opened it to see Grampy Gay standing in the coveralls he wore while he was tending his garden. "It's rose inspection day," he told me.

never knew my Great Grampy when I walked the mortal world. He passed long before I was born. Even when I passed over, I did not meet him. It wasn't until Daddy's cousin gave him a shoot from Grampy's rose bush that I met him when he asked me to accompany him to my parent's house to check on the bush.

Grampy was sent to France in World War I. He was in the trenches, often exposed to the mustard gas that would take him from the mortal world too soon. When the gas masks were removed and the bullets not firing, Grampy told his mates that, if he got home, he would spend his days tending to his rose bushes, as far from war as possible.

When he got home, he bought a rose bush and kept it alive during the Depression. When he passed, his son and daughter, when they had their places, took a shoot of the rose bush and planted it, keeping it alive. Grampy's offspring also had a lone boy and girl, and when they grew up, they got a shoot, and now the rose bush is a hundred years old and thriving at its new homes.

Grampy checks on each off-shoot during the year, usually with an angel dog, and I am proud I am one of the chosen ones.

My parents have done well with their roses. Dozens have bloomed in the last week. Grampy and I landed in my parent's slim backyard, and he checked the bush while I took notes. He mentioned some down parts that needed to be cut back and where they needed to be trimmed.

He then stopped, took a deep sniff, stood back, and said, "Your parents are doing a fine job," then we walked into the bush like Shoeless Joe disappearing into the cornfield.

I know Grapmy is proud that his rose bushes still thrivel. There is something of him living in a world his soul left long ago.

It is the finest tribute to a loved one I can think of.

We all want to leave something living behind

Thursday, June 29, 2023

Poetry Thursday


Once again, Angel Sammys and Teddys Pawetaton have provided us with a photo for Poetry Thursday.

Like all boys, I love my mother

A love like no other

Although some said she was fond of the drink

That she made in the kitchen sink

My aunts said I was too young

To remember when the Christmas tree she hung

Carefully on the long clothesline
Set it on fire, and watched it burn while sipping wine

When I was six she sent the dog to school

No one minded until she peed in the pool

My dad was mad and blamed her for drinking

After seeing the volume in bottles shrinking

At the park the other mom’s judged her

Because she slept while I licked the dog’s fur

They talked about her drinking with great disgust

Especially after she forgot me on the crosss town bus

My favorite days was when she wanted to take advantage of the weather

Put Puppy on her back and me she did tether

People did look crossly at puppy, mommy and me

Especially when I stopoped at the hydrant, lifted my leg and did pee

Soon after they came and took Mommy away

I was very sad day after day

Daddy said she was getting care

To get her back home I said a prayer

Finally the day came she came back

No longer drinking, and smoking in the nude giving the neighbors a heart attack

From that day forward she was as calm as a nun

I was glad she wasn’t drinking but boy I missed the fun

Tuesday, June 27, 2023

Beat This Caption


Fred didn't resist. If he made it back to the pond, his wife would berate him for smelling like fish and pussy. 

Monday, June 26, 2023

Monday Question

 Now that summer is here what is your relationship with ice or ice cream? Do you like ice chips, or ice in your drinks, or ice cream?

  Even though I poised the question I have not tried ice or ice cream. 

Sunday, June 25, 2023

The Ruby Rose Report: Riding In My Car


My siblings could have been better travelers. Blake, who predated us all, and was sadly only with my parents for five short years, was the best, happy to lie in the car, anxious to see where the trip would lead. While worried that she saw something, Foley learned from her and enjoyed the ride too. Unfortunately, this did not rub off on Pocket, who barked and whined every time the car slowed down, then River, who wanted to be in the front seat and would figure out how to get loose of any constraints put on her.

It was good for me to be trained by angels instead of living siblings. While Foley never felt a reason to be jealous, confident of her place in her family's heart, Pocket, then River, who learned from her, worried about losing their place on mom's lap and wanted it all the time, even in transport. It led to them being left home a lot.

But who could leave me home? I don't balk when left alone and must get in my crate. I like it in there when I am alone. It's my safe sport. And, when my parents come home, I don't bark to be let out. I know they have missed me and will open it soon. I am a dog comfortable in its wrinkly skin.

When first ride with my parents was from the airport the day I arrived. I was nervous, haven take trains, planes, and automobiles to get to my new family, and was on guard, not knowing what I had gotten myself into. I realized it was the best possible situation by the night's end.

The first time I accompanied my parents on their errands, I was in my crate, which I liked, but it was awkward getting me in and out, so they switched to a bag, which I wouldn't say I wanted because it wasn't big enough for me to stretch out. I was happy to go but wished I wasn't in steerage.

This week everything changed. My dad bought a tether from the seat belt to my travel harness. They tried it with River, but she kept fighting to get in the front seat. That seemed like a lot of effort, so I laid down in the back, chewed some toys, and enjoyed the ride.

When I got home, without a yip of complaint, and a meaningful thrust, I was told I was a good girl and got a treat for doing nothing!

This doing nothing thing may be a great way to get treats without effort.

I am on to something here.

Friday, June 23, 2023

Foley's Tails From Rainbow Bridge: Bella the Dog who Traded Places

When humans let us go to the Bridge, they take on all our pain and guilt and carry that pain. It is a sacrifice we dogs never thought we could repay until Bella found a way.

Bella became known to us angels when her dad was diagnosed with Stage 3 kidney cancer. His prognosis was poor. Bella made sure she prayed every day, and in her dreams, she came to us begging that her father, the center of the family with four children, be spared.

But, it had been written that her dad's song was ending, and the Bridge awaited a new soul. It was a contract that could not be broken. Bella stayed with her dad through the illness, and she could tell he was fading away. It broke her heart to see him with his children, knowing how brokenhearted they would be when he left. Bella made a final offer to the Powers to save her dad.

Bella knew the Bridge wanted someone from her family to pass from kidney disease, and Bella offered up her body so her dad could stay with the family. The Powers had a long deliberation, but finally, they agreed to her terms.

Bella's dad was enthused when he started to feel better. He saw his best pal Bella slowing down and drinking much water, but he thought he was projecting his illness onto her.

Then two events happened within a day. Bella's dad went to the doctor and was told he was in complete remission, and then they took Bella to the vet to check on her decreased appetite and were stunned to find out that she had the same disease as her dad, and operating on her was not an option.

Bella had persuaded the Powers to let her take her father's place, so in this instance, she took in all her parent's pain and suffering and let him stay with his family.

As Bella grew worse, his father spent time with her, as she did with him. He knew she had arranged to take his place, but she did not let on; miracle workers never do.

When it was time for Bella to pass over, her father, before taking her sickness and pain from her, something he would carry for the rest of his long life, thanked Bella and gave him a sly smile before she passed.

Bella has been treated like a hero at the Bridge, where she as a dog who convinced the powers to take her. 

Thursday, June 22, 2023

Poetry Thursday


Once again, Angel Sammys and Teddys Pawetaton have provided us with a photo for Poetry Thursday.

I saved all my money to see the show

I was told people like us can’t afford to go

But I have always believed if there is a will, there's a way

And now I was going to see my favorite performer play

I don’t want to tell you what I had to do to get a ticket

There were things I was glad to do that my old uncle said weren’t cricket

But I idolized the singer so

So I could not accept the answer no

When I got an email with the ticket, I felt like Charle Bucket

I uploaded a picture of me and the ticket with the caption, “Suck it”

I bought new clothes in case my hero saw me

And took notice of the girl singing like a banshee

Maybe I would be brought up on stage

And in funny banter, we would engage

Maybe we would sing a duet

And be so good we toured with her quartet

When the gates opened, I rushed inside

I was five seats from the front on the right side

And just before the show began in front of me did sat

A bitch with a three-foot-tall hat

I could not see the performance, and my idol could not see me

I asked the woman to remove her hat, and she said, “que?”

Why didn’t I take Spanish in high school?

Instead of Latin, I’m such a fool.

I heard the show was great.

I missed it trying to download Google translate

I learned even if you achieve your dreams that

It can be ruined by a Spanish lady in a big fat hat

Tuesday, June 20, 2023

Monday, June 19, 2023

Foley's Tale From Rainbow Bridge: Rex's Tennis Ball Library


 It is the simplest of activities. Someone throws a ball; a dog chases it, grasps the orb in his mouth, and returns it to start the procedure again.

I used to watch Pocket perform this act with our dad, and I never got the joy of it, for either, since it involved wet hairy balls, and I had my full of them as a want to be Mom.

That was until I met Rex.

It was along the river. A man was throwing the ball in the river, and Rex, a Yellow Lab, splashed into the water, retrieved it, and brought it to the man. It was a pleasant show.

When they took a break, I asked Rex if his dad was throwing the ball, and he sadly said no, because he had to leave his dad behind. His grandad, who had taught his son the perfect technique to throw a ball for a dog, was doing it until they were all reunited.

Rex’s granddad scratched his ears and told him he had to check on his other dogs. He had two dozen dogs throughout his life, and now they were with him and his son’s dogs, Rex being the latest addition.

They lived in the southwest, near a beach, and each day, work his dad walked with him to the beach, and they would play ball until the sun disappeared into the waves.

It started when he was young, that magical time when the song is before you, with thousands of notes and uncountable stanzas, seemingly eternal, but soon, without realizing it, half the song was over, then it got slower with bigger pauses until it faded away.

One day Rex was a puppy, happily splashing in the water, and the next, he was old, struggling to get back to shore. But, when he did, he dropped the ball at his dad’s feet, “just one more, Dad,” his eyes said, “while we still can.”

The day came when Rex watched the ball disappear in the waves, slowly rolling out to sea.

Rex’s dad knew there was a place the dog could be sent to play again: It was the Bridge, and before he went home, he helped Rex at the beginning of his journey, knowing that by sunrise, Rex would be romping in the water again.

The following day Rex’s dad went to the beach with the remaining tennis balls and wood, from which he made a sign with Rex’s picture on it, saying he was the most goodly dog in the world and he wanted other dogs and humans to play fetch in the waves in his honor. Sometimes acts of giving are the most heartbreaking.

Rex will make sure that his dad has a new partner to throw the ball to like he has his granddad, but it won’t be the same as it was the first time Rex and his dad played and bonded.

But he won’t be alone when his dad does, as he has inspired dozens of people to play fetch at the beach with their dogs.

In memory of Rex and his Dad.

Sunday, June 18, 2023

The Ruby Rose Report: Midnight Zooms


I am a chill little dog. I spend most of the day on Mommy's lap, half-covered in a blanket. I get anxious around supper time for food, and my pre-dinner walk. After I eat, I play for a bit, then retreat to sit with Mommy until my treat toy and snuffle mat are replenished. Then I am next to Mommy until bedtime. It's a good routine.

I stay there until we go to bed. I sleep under the covers on the big bed. I start on top, licking Daddy and chewing on the bones he brought in for me. Because she works hard, Mommy sleeps first, just me and Daddy.

Some nights I get under the blanket, but I also get out of bed, go into the living room, and bark for Daddy, who, luckily, is a night owl. He gets up, and it's our playtime.

I always leave some food in my treat spinning toy and my snuggle mat in case I am hungry in the middle of the night, which I usually have. It has taken me a year to train Daddy on my midnight escapades, and he almost has it perfected,

Once I am done scarfing for food, his first duty is to throw one of the pre-selected balls from the living room into the kitchen. I watch it for a minute until it comes to a rest, let it think it's okay, then attack it, running around the house with it in my mouth, jumping on the couch, hanging over the edge, trying to chew the ball, and discover gravity as the ball bounces away.

When I get tired of that ball, he throws more until I tire of hops, then he throws stuffies or moves them on the floor to stimulate my imagination and get me to attack him until it stops the constant squeaking.

Then I jump on the couch and start chewing one of my many bones. I lose all track of time while I am chewing. I am only interrupted by my Dad's selfish yawns. He could put me back in bed, but I am only settling once I am ready, which I am only once I do the last nightly rituals.

I zoom. I zoom through the kitchen, I zoom around the living room chairs, I zoom under the kitchen table, I misjudged my exit and almost knock a chair over, I recover and zoom, zoom, zoom, zoom, look out the window and bark, zoom, zoom, zoom, jump into the lift chair, scrunch up the seat cover, sit down and breathe like a smoker who just brought their laundry upstairs zoom, zoom, zoom, then jump on the couch, look at my Daddy, and demand to be brought into the bedroom where Mommy is sleeping.

I am almost ready to sleep, but before I do, I jump on a sleeping Mommy to wake her up and tell her about my zooms and balls.

Now I need to lie down to save energy during the daylight so I can play all night.

Friday, June 16, 2023

Foley's Tales From Rainbow Bridge: Welcoming Katie Kitty

 May be an image of cat

The circle of pets' lives is that when one leaves, another comes in to care for their parents. We know they are too fragile to be left alone. Having a loyal companion is essential to keeping them sane.

 Momma Diana was unaware that one of her beloved pets was making arrangements to go to the Bridge when she introduced Reba to her pack. She thought she was adding another member to the family, not maintaining the number of pets she had, because one member was leaving.

When finding a new pet for their parents, most animals choose their species because they are tasked with meeting their parent's specific needs, which are best handled by one of their own.

Kattie Kitty knew her song was ending, and she needed another soul with fur to help her mom deal with the tribulations of daily life and her eventual passing. She had come from a mixed pack and saw how dogs and cats filled their mom's heart with love. She knew while he mom would be minus a cat adding a dog would be what she needed.

Scooter George, their mom's beloved heart dog, who went to the Bridge a scant ten months ago, and is still in his mom's heart and thoughts, agreed to work with Katie Kitty to find the right dog for their mom. As an angel, Scooter would conduct the interviews and present the applicants to Katie Kitty, and she would make the final decision.

Scooter George and Katie Kitty decided on Ruby, a darling puppy, to pick up the gauntlet and carry on as their mom's heart pet. Ruby was thrilled with the assignment, knowing Momma Diane was one of the world's premier pet parents. Reba could not have asked for a better mom.

But Reba was still worried about her role in the family, and while Katie Kitty was tired and her train was slowing, she still managed to squirrel away enough heartbeats to extend her life.

When Reba had her grooming appointment, Katie Kitty decided that the puppy was ready to take over as the heart pet. While she rested in the empty house, Scooter came, took her by the paw, and led her over the Bridge to the rest of their angels, where she would begin a charmed life on the immortal side.

When she returned home, Momma Diane was stunned to find that Katie Kitty had gone to walk with the angels. Her heart was shattered, but she had Reba pick up and rebuild the pieces, just as her predecessors had. They knew Reba was ready.

She was in good paws.

Thursday, June 15, 2023

Poetry Thursday


Once again, Angel Sammys and Teddys Pawetaton have provided us with a photo for Poetry Thursday.

Leo was the proudest cat in the jungle

Most of all he was proud of his mungle

Just as Seth liked to show off his son Enos

Leo liked to hang around exhibiting his penis.

He hung in a tree

Just as free as could be

As soon as in the east rose the dawn sun

Leo was exposing his giant Johnson

Word still spread of the lion well endowed

Animals came from all over to be wowed

Even remarked the great King Kong

“Did you see the lion with the huge dong?”

The truth was that Leo was an amiable guy

But was quite shy

While there were many girls in the Pride

Leo was too bashful to ask one to be his bride.

One day Samantha came walking through

She looked at Leo and said “How are you?”

And he knew she was the one he wanted by his side

And not just because she had a vagina quite wide

It was arranged for them to go on a date

And leave their love up to fate

They went to see Shakespeare performed by chimps

And remarked that Friar Laurence was nothing but a pimp

Leo brought her back to his den

And he was shocked when Samantha said then

In a tone that hit Leo like a brick

“That thing hanging down is your tail not your dick”

Monday, June 12, 2023

Monday Question


I Hate My Boyfriend's Dog DN long

Do you have any friends or family members who don't like dogs?

Ruby's Answer: Daddy's mom didn't like dogs. I never met her, but she used to say Foley bared her teeth at her and growled. For those of you who don't know, this is Foley the Ferocious.

Sunday, June 11, 2023

The Ruby Rose Report: I Would Do Anything For Love But I Won't Do That


I will let my parents do anything to me. They can play with my toes, rub my ears, put harnesses on me, take me in the car, whatever they want because I do it for love. I would do anything for love, but I won't do that.

I refer to letting them touch me with a brush. If not held, I scoot away; if I am, I fight. I love a human touch, but that is it.

My parents usually have dogs with hair. I am their first fur-wearing dog in a long time, so they must be more in touch with the technique. Regardless, they could be Edward Scissorhands. I would still bark and balk.

Thankfully, I am not a big shedder. A Griffon at rest barely shed, but a Griffon at play, or worse yet, a nervous sort, when their blood gets up, they shed like an old oak tree in an October northeaster.

I usually go to my Dad when I am nervous since he is high-strung too. Panic loves company. Stressed people need something to do with their hands, and stroking a little dog is soothing. Between his trembly pets and my nervousness, he is covered with my hair in no time.

He gets a roller to remove the fur, which is a waste, becomes humans should be proud of wearing their dog's fur. It is much more personal than a tattoo, and it says to other parents, "I have a dog, they own me, and I don't care."

My groomer brushes me, and I let them because they are professionals and know the proper way to stroke. I heard my parents see that the next time I am groomed, they will ask what brush they use on me. It is futile. You can use the same bat as Aaron Judge, but that doesn't mean you will hit home runs.

The last time they asked, the groomer said they use a glove brush for horses. My parents could not hear, but I could when the groomer said to the others, "They do know you are kidding, don't they?"

They didn't.

I will continue to fight them when they try to brush me. I am doing it for them. My fur is my gift to them.

Not every species is willing to go bald to prove their love.

The Ruby Rose Report: The Gift

  I had finished my walk with my Dad, having inspected the homes and gardens en route, and barked instructions on how to bring them up to...