Monday Question

 Is there a song with your name in it, or another song your parents sing to you?

Ruby’s Answer - my Mom likes to sing Ruby Tuesday to me while my dad changes the Clash song Rudie Can’t Fail to Ruby Can’t Fail

Ruby’s Sunday Funnies

  

A teacher says, “Okay, class. Today we’re going to be talking about the tenses. If I say ‘I’m beautiful,’ which tense is it?”

Little Johnny raises his hand and says, “Obviously past tense, Miss.”

Mommy has told her little girl all about the making of babies. Little Annie is now silent for a while.

"You understand it now?" Mommy asks.

"Yes," replies her daughter.

"Do you still have any questions?"

"Yes, how about little kittens? How does that work?"

"In exactly the same way as with babies."

"Wow!" the girl exclaims. "My daddy can do ANYTHING!"

 

Friday Fill-Ins

 

It’s Friday Fill In time. Ruby’s fill ins are in capitals.

• If I had to choose a fictional world to live in it would be THIS ONE.
• A BOOK ON PUPPIES FOR IDIOTS CHANGED MY LIFE is a book or movie that changed my life BECAUSE I WAS HUNGRY, THEN I ATE, AND I WAS NO LONGER HUNGRY. 
• As a kid, I gave my BIRTH MOTHER the name TEETS FOR TWO BECAUSE IT WAS WHERE ME AND MY SISTER MET FOR BREAKFAST EVERY MORNING.
• If I had a parrot I would  teach it to say COMMON MAGA PHRASES SO THEY WOULD REALIZE MY BARKING IS NOT AS ANNOYING AS THEY THINK.

Poetry Thursday

   

Jonce again Angel Sammys and and Teddys Pawetatonc have challenged us to write a poem about the picture 

Sally thought she needed to give her sister a verbal push

Her sister Sue thought she should hush

But Sally thought Sue should rush

And trim her overgrown bush

2

Sue surely had her own ways

Some called it a faze

Others thought it was a craze

But Sue continued to let her bush grow for days

3

Finally Sally sat down and told Sue to mow the lawn around her bits

Because if it grew more no one would be able to find and eat her grits

Navigating her undercarriage was like wading through a tar pit

And Sally didn’t want people to think her sister's fofu was unfit

4

Sue said since she stopped trimming her bajango she had never felt so free

Even if she had to blow dry her yoni each time she had to pee

And Sally began to think she should grow out her big tree

And soon Sally’s vajayjay had a goatee

5

Their doctors warned them it was unhealthy not to tend to their bean

And took pictures of their cookies because no one would believe what they had seen

But soon the girls’ sunny disposition was turning mean

And the doctors said their unruly twats were making them into evil queens

6

The sisters tried to trim their overgrown penis fly traps

But each effort turned up craps

To get to their beavers groomers needed a map

But the muff took over as their will did sap

7

 Now the sisters walk the earth reduced to nothing but their Minnie’s

Walking the earth be it rain or sunny.

In times neither sad or funny

Two tortured girls taken over by their coochies. 

Wordless Wednesday

  

Beat This Caption

Here's Johnny! Here I come. Give me a minute. Yeah you might want to get a snack, this is going to be awhile

Monday Question

 Describe your perfect day.

A late morning snuggled under the covers with my parents. A breakfast with freshly cooked crisp bacon. A long walk in the woods where I can do dog stuff I rarely get to do. An afternoon snooze under a blanket on my mom’s lap. A dinner with real chicken. Watching the sun set on my couch looking over the putting green and pickle ball courts and barking at whatever moves Another nap on Mommy’s lap. Back to snuggling in bed with my parents.