Poetry Thursday

 

 

My friend who is one spoiled cat gave me the picture below for the Thursday Poetry blogå

The Big man from Freedonia need more living space

Where, freely could live, his master race

And, with other countries, to keep a pace

And mostly for the beans he used to make his orange face.

To find his special bean he targeted the land of  green.

Its leaders dismissed the orange leader as crazy and mean.

But it was only their land that grew the orange bean.

And the Orange Leader wanted it, and was unafraid to cause a scene.

The Orange Leader first tried to buy the Land of Green with his riches

He predicted that they would cave, the sons of a bitches

But he was told his offer wouldn’t even pay for their lakes full of fishes

And now they would find out what happened when you didn’t succumb to the Orange Leader’s wishes

Then the Orange Leader let his voice soar

To war, to war, Freedonia is going to war

A fact we can’t ignore

We’re going to war

The Orange Leader’s assistant Weasel said over the Land Of Green no one would fight

And Freedonia had a right to the Land of Green because they had the might

And other countries would retreat in fright

And he could make the Land of Green white

The Land of Green has an army, but it wasn’t fine

And they were arrived Freedonia would wrap them up like twine

But their Professor said “I have an idea, it is mine.”

And soon the Land of Green had miles of troops on the battle line

In the face of an overwhelming enemy Freedonia did towards home beat feet

Although the Orange Leader said they won, he could never admit defeat

And the Land of Green didn’t let on their deceit

That it was mere snowmen with sticks for guns that caused Freedonia’s hasty retreat.

Wordless Wednesday

 

Beat This Captioin

 

Hey, I don’t know if you are aware, but the door is locked. Just wanted to let you know. Carry on.

Monday Question

 What do you do that most make your parents feel loved?

Ir is the sad look I give them when I want them to sit with me. 

Sunday Funnies

 

Three couples are trying to get married at the same church. There is a young couple, a middle-aged couple, and an elderly couple. The three couples meet with the priest and discuss when they can get married.
 

"If you wish to get married in my church, you must all go one month without having sex," says the priest.
 

One month later the three couples return to the church and talk to the priest. He then asks the elderly couple, "Have you completed the month with sex?"
 

"Yes we have, it was easy," replies the elderly couple.

"How about you?" He asks the middle-aged couple.

"It was hard, but we didn't have sex for the whole month," they respond.
 

"And how about you two?" He asks the young couple.

 "No we couldn't do it," responds the boyfriend.

 "Tell me why," says the priest.

"Well my girlfriend had a can of corn in her hand and she accidentally dropped it. She bent over to pick it up and that's when it happened."

The priest then tells them, "You're not welcome in my church."

"We're not welcome in the supermarket either," says the boyfriend

 A  husband was sitting quietly reading his paper one morning, peacefully enjoying himself, when his wife sneaks up behind him and whacks him on the back of the head with a huge frying pan.

"What the heck was that for!" he asked.

She replies, "I found a piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Marylou written on it..."

"Oh, dear, remember two weeks ago when I went to the horse races? Well, Marylou was the name of one of the horses I placed a bet on."

The explanation seems to appease her, and she leaves the room to go about her business.

Three days later, the man is again sitting in his chair reading the morning paper. His wife abruptly hangs up the telephone and then whacks him on the back of the head with the huge frying pan.

"What the heck did I do wrong this time!" he asked.

She answered, "Your horse just called!"

A farmer walked into a bar and saw the local tractor salesman sitting there, head hung low, obviouslyupset, drowning his sorrows in his beer.

"What's up, John?" asked the farmer. "Gosh Bob, I'll tell you what ... if I don't sell a tractor soon, I'm gonnahave to close my shop."

"Now John, things could be worse," said Bob.

"How do you figure?" asked John.

"Well, John - you know my 'ornery cow, Bessie? I went to milk her this morning and she just kept flickingher tail in my face. So I grabbed a piece of rope and tied it up to the rafter. Then, the nasty thing wentand kicked the bucket away! So I tied her leg to the wall. Then she kicked my stool right out fromunderneath me!

But I was out of rope. So I took my belt off and used it to tie her other leg to the other side of the stall.Well wouldn't you just know it...my damn pants fell down."

And John, if you can convince my wife that I was in there to MILK that cow, I'll buy a tractor from you.

Friendly Friday Fill-Ins

 Let’s ring in the new year with FriendlyFriday Fill Ins. There are four statements: the first two statements are written by 15AndMeowing, and the final two are done  by  Four-Legged Furballs. Please check them out.  Here are this week's statements with my fill ins are in Bold

1. Staying in bed as long as possible like Jack and Rose on the Titanic, but with more ferocity, is a New Year’s tradition for me.

2. The bacon that comes in a bag from the supermarket, is not the sane ask the bacon that is put on hamburgers in the supermarket.

3, I would pick Run the world (Girls) as my theme song for 2026’

4. I am a coward at running up to another dog but brave at running up behind them. 

Poetry Thursday

 

 

 

My friend who is one spoiled cat gave me the picture below for the Thursday Poetry blog

For the first time in his life Bob was invited to a New Year’s Eve party

He was overly talkative, annoying and farty

But Sue, had a moment of lost clarity

And invited him despite the possible calamity

*

“He stares at me all day,” Mary said

Sue confirmed that he was only interested in getting her into bed

Wendy commented that his personal file showed evidence he was inbred

When Mary answered she wanted to give him a chance and Lucinda worried before the New Year they would be dead

**

Bob bought a new shirt and pants

Hi Karate cologne recommended by his two aunts

And to make sure someone would his greatest desire grant

He put in his pants a large egg plant

***

Bob made sure he showed up early

And thanks to pre drinking a little curly

He sat on the couch with his eggplant erect waiting for a willing girlie

But grew bored, turned on Pluto and watched Laverne and Shirley.

****

By 8:00 o’clock the revelers began moving in

And the party begin

Bon quickly downed four tonic and gins

And partied until the room began to spin

******

Bob woke up on Sue’s couch with a hangover

And stumbled home crushing Sue’s bed of clover

Until morning he stayed under his cover

And in the morning he hurried to work so his New Year’s exploits could be discovered

*******

He found Sue at her desk looking cute and perky

And asked about his wild exploits his memory being murky

She said everyone had a great time at the party

Despite his passing out for good at 8:30