Friday, February 7, 2014
A Pocket of Snow
The big question this winter is how many Pocket fulls of snow do we get with each storm.
Daddy does not trust meteorologists. He says that they predict how much snow is going to fall. and, inevitably, that amount is wrong. But when he puts the TV on the meteorologists are congratulating themselves on getting the snowfall amounts exactly right.
This is the type of thing that bothers Daddy a great deal and no one else any deal. He found out that they measure snow on what is called a snowboard. They put the board down, and then every hour they go out and measure the snow, then wipe it off, and measure it again an hour later, until it stops snowing or Shawn White steals the board and breaks his wrist.
So the totals represent what fell, but not what is actually on the ground, which has either been compacted by more snow, or melted on contact. I found the entire thing extremely boring until I heard Daddy say he invented a new way to measure snow.
First he went outside and shoveled a hole in the snow. Then he came back inside. got me and put me in the hole, then turned and yelled to Mommy: “We got a half a Pocket of snow.” A couple of days later we got more snow. Daddy went outside, dug a bigger hole, put me in, and yelled to Mommy “We got two and a half Pockets of snow.”
I have been reduced to a unit of measurement.
Where will this foolishness end? Is your GPS going to tell you that the nearest Home Depot is 1,376 Pockets away? Are they going to announce a David Ortiz home run traveled 687 Pockets? Is a trip to Jupiter going to be described as 8,760 light Pockets away?
They are talking about more snow for this weekend, I don’t know how many Pockets we are going to get. I hope it’s a short storm. I hate having to go outside for multiple Pocket measurements
In the meanwhile you and your parents should consider your own Pockets. Are you getting the right Pockets of kibble? Do you parents earn enough Pockets? It is time to demand more Pockets.
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