Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Too much to lose

I remember being on the floor playing with Blake and Daddy. I don't know what we were doing. Just fooling around. Then Blake stopped playing.

We knew she was sick. She had something wrong in the brain. We knew her song was ending. She looked at Daddy. His voice broke. "Blake?" he asked. She walked over to him, a resigned look in her eyes. She got into pee position, and something came out. It wasn't pee. It kept coming out all night. Daddy kept taking her out. He ended the night sleeping on her like she was a pillow. That morning was the last time I saw her. She went to the Bridge that night. I miss her.

Then there was Jax. A dogtor misdiagnosed him. And Copper, died in her sleep. Finally Skye, sweet Skye, only five months old. I miss them all.

Then we got Pocket. These were my friends. Pretty much my only friends. But I was a happy dog. I laid in the sun all day, slept all night, never had many adventures. Then I learned how to use the computer.

And oh the friends I found. Tanner, Sophie, Teddie Earnest, Ladybug, Morgan the Miracle Maltese, We would run and play and laugh, and, even though many will tell you doggies can't, we even sang.

It was wonderful, I had never been such a happy dog. Then Tanner got sick and went to the bridge, then Teddie, and Morgan. As I write this Ladybug seems ready to go. And I hate it.

I know us dogs have short lives, and I think that's for the best. The longer you hang around the more people expect of you. If we lived 30 or 40 years they'd be wanting us to get jobs, teaching us how to drive, offering us low interest adjustable mortgages, making us vote and think. They start making kids do these things when they get to their late teens, why wouldn't they do the same with us?

But when we go to the bridge, when we have to leave our friends, it's just so unbearably hard. And lately it's just been one hard swat on the nose after another. I'd just like to stop, just for a little bit, so we can play without the pain.

See here's a secret about dogs: it's the rule of seven. We age seven times faster than you do, we enjoy walks seven times more, we play seven times harder, we have seven times more babies, and we love seven times more.

You see, that's why we have to go first. Because you will mourn, will cry, will be heartbroken when we go to the bridge, but if you left us? We would be seven times more heartbroken, miss you seven times more, cry seven times harder. In time, you will go get another puppy, from a breeder, or from a rescue. We don't get to go to the jail and rescue a human, or take a loan on some kibble and buy one. We have to wait until someone finds us a home. And it's never the same.

So that's why we need to leave you, sorry, but it's too painful to lose you. And to lose one another. I love my pack, and my heartbreaks with each loss. But it explodes with happiness at each new addition.

So, for you poor parents who have lost a pup, I know how hard it is to "replace" us. But you are a Brigade parent, which means you have more love to give pups then any other parents anywhere. And if you can find the courage, if you are willing to take the chance on getting your heart broken to pieces again, could you please consider a new pup, because there are lots more dogs in need of loving, special parents like you, then there are loving parents looking for dogs.

And remember, before we go, we give your our heart, so you're never alone, and never forget that love, so you can pay it forward to a new dog.

Love to all my dog parents. Sorry we cause you such pain. But I'm guessing you know how much we're worth it.


  1. Oh dear is so true. We would cry 7 times harder. And to see our friends leave makes our humans cry. The bridge babies could never be replaced as each one of us is different. But to give a new dog a home......that is what the bridge babies would want. And trust me, they are WATCHIG and teaching the new pup SOME, but not all of their own tricks.

  2. We are numb w/grief over our recent losses and trying so very hard to embrace the good times. Yes, they are worth it!!


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