Most dogs don’t like going to the groomers for the normal reasons: The baths, the blow dryers, the nail trimming, the being locked in tiny cages, the whining dogs. But my first trip to Pocket’s groomer gave me a surprise much worse than nail grinding. My baby Daddy was there!
To explain: Us Griffons are not the most popular breed. And our litters are small so breeders tend to work closely together. While I was born in Florida my first human Mom was from the Northeast and she came to know the woman who owns the grooming shop my current Mommy uses. When one of the women who works at the groomers, Pam, saw the owner’s Griffons, she fell in love, as all human who meet Griffons do. When one of my Florida’s pups produced a litter Pam bought one of the males. And after I was born, to make more perfect pups, I was mated with Pam’s stud.
So, when Pam learned I was coming in to get groomed she thought it was a good idea to bring my little McLovin in to play with me. But first they did what any girl would want done when seeing an ex. They made me look my best bathing me, giving me a good brushing and a manicure.
Then they put me on the floor. I saw McLovin in a mist of discarded flea powder. He tried to pretend he wasn’t interested and gnawed on a bone, and I wasn’t going to look desperate so I performed the maneuver all female dogs use to gain a boy’s interest. I lifted my leg and licked myself.
McLovin came trotting over and told me I smelled good. I told him thank you and then we did the awkward circle and butt sniff that dogs do with their exes. We made small talk about our Moms, and the weather, and he complimented me on my snaggle tooth, which he knew was the way to my heart.
He then gave me a little nip on my tail and I got on my back legs and pawed at him. I rolled over and her began to nip at his feet and bark. I rolled and we stood on our back legs pawing at one another. Then we came back down and chased each other around the table until I stopped and he put his paws on my back and stood up.
“Hey, wait a minute!” I yelled. “I don’t have my baby making parts anymore.”
I could feel him deflate on my back. He got down and walked around to face me. “What did you do with them?” he asked.
“I had them removed when I came to live with my family.”
“Red rocket tease,” he said shaking his head.
“But we can still be friends can’t we?” I asked.
He seemed to think it over, and then he put his paws down, and his head between them and pounced at me. Soon we were barking and chasing one another while Pocket had to watch from her locked cage.
So old boyfriends are good for something.
When Mommy came to get me at the groomers I was a little disappointed. But McLovin promised that next time I came he would be here and he would keep his rocket in the launch pad. McLovin and I are purely platonic friends now and that’s OK with me.
Although I do wish we had stayed together for the children.