The Return of Cousin Neely By River Song

It was a typical day when something happened that changed my entire week in a way that can never be forgotten.  Mommy had gone out, which I didn’t like, but I had stayed calm on Daddy’s lap.  Then I heard Mommy’s car.  I ran to the window and saw that our grandbaby Meg was with her and Meg had a bag  She would be staying with us for a few days!  Cool!  And then I saw the leash in Mommy’ hand and I thought “oh no!”  It was Meg’s dog Neely.  A big tailed male Shih Tzu.  After seeing Neely I jumped on Pocket’s back, bent my legs and smushed Pocket into the floor until Daddy lifted me off of her.  Daddy thought I was trying to hurt her but I was hugging her.  Hugging her for dear life.

In our house is the perfect family unit.  Two dogs.  Two people.  A person for every pup and a pup for every person.  You would assume adding one more person:  Meg, and one more dog:  Neely would not upset the equation but you would be wrong because Neely does not respect the one person one dog rule.  Neely wants to be with every person all the time.  He is a lap jumper.  Instead of snuggling on one lap he bounces from one to another in a most disrespectful and selfish manner.  And he had no respect for personal property.  He immediately attacked my toys walking around with one in his mouth squeaking.

And yes he does come with food (it is the same bag of quality food the accompanies him each time he visits.  His Mom wants our Mom to think she feeds good food but she feeds the cheap stuff and only brings the good stuff over so she doesn’t get a lecture for Mommy.  But Mommy is going to tell her to stop doing it because the expiration date  on the ten pound bag of good food is in three months.  Mommies can never stop being Mommies) but he still gets my food as treats.  (Which is maybe for the best.  He probably gets chocolate covered rawhides at his house.)  And he gets my kibble when my parents are eating and share kibbles with us.  Laps!  Kibbles!  Mom time!  This dog is taking over my life.

And plus you know me and male dogs.  I have the Kavorka.  I brush by a male dog and I get pregnant.  They can’t resist me.  It’s a curse.  I feel bad for him.  You know he has to live with all of this.

Mommy said she took care of it so I couldn’t have babies again but who can trust a doctor if you know what I mean?  Right now he is sleeping in Meg’s room and I’m in Mommy’s and I like that.

Just hope that he goes home before we both give into sweet neutered temptation.