Tails From Rainbow Bridge: Life on Mars

We do not know if we can handle any more heartbreak as more friends join us at Rainbow Bridge.  Adding to this distress is the violence that is becoming more prevalent in society.  Is Earth really the best place for dogs?  Or is there somewhere we could live peacefully?

The Rainbow Bridge High Council asked me to lead an expedition to determine if Mars would be a more proper home for dogs.

I selected three other doganaut's to go with me.  I picked Brody because he can always find food.  I choose Morgan because he is a great diplomat and I took Tommy Tunes to photograph the entire expedition.

Things did not go well.

First, there was the lift off.  Tommy forgot to strap himself in and crashed against our window screen as we left the ground.  He stayed that way as we burst through the atmosphere.  The G-Forces we so great his mouth opened, and we got a drool bath. I was able to pull him down and get him strapped back into his seat.

I was in charge of the landing craft.  The Council should have picked someone with longer legs.  I couldn’t reach the brake, and we tumbled into a dusty canyon and got thrown in different directions.  When I sat up, I was alone and covered in red dirt.

I set out to find my friends.  I found Tommy chasing the Mars Rover around a valley.  Tommy was biting its antenna.  At Mission Control the NASA workers were stunned to find the first sign of life on Mars was a beagle with a camera and a string of popcorn for snacking around his neck.  I grabbed Tommy and told him that our mission was top secret.  To make it up to the metal beast Tommy left his popcorn.

We found Brody lying on the ground with a giant Mars rocks between his paws.  He was licking the rock.  I told him to put the rock down, but Brody insisted he was going to keep licking until he got to the caramel center.  We decided to let him retain part of the rock, which he somehow bit off because Brody was not leaving another planet nutless.

Finally, we found Morgan sitting with Clifford, a big red dog from a big red planet.  He told us that he was hiding until he saw Morgan, who he could tell, was the nicest dog in the world.  Morgan wanted to adopt Clifford because he was all alone.  Clifford said he had come to Mars years ago, and his ship broke.  He informed us that Mars was a terrible place because there were no humans to love.

We found pieces of his shuttle, and pieces of ours, and we put them together to make a ship big enough to transport Clifford and the four of us.  Thanks to Clifford’s giant paws we put it together quickly and flew back home.

If there is no human life on Mars, then that is not a home for any dog.