Bob woke up naked under a tree
With a girl he did not know he had made whoopee.
And now he was powerfully hungry
And needed food he could eat for tree
He found some laundry hanging on the line
And he picked out to wear something sublime
And then he saw the most wonderful sign
At the Big Boy you could eat for free if you could finish it all in time
Bob presented himself at the Big Boy and said he was their man
Finishing five pounds of food and getting it for free was his plan
Just bring him some utensils and a flat pan
And an unencumbered path to the can
A plate full of nachos was the meal of the day
And when placed on table the meal did sway
And Bob thought he could never put this much food away
He was hoping he could eat enough that they would not make him pay
Bob began eating bite by bite
But knew he would have to pick it up if he was to be done by night
But the pile didn’t seem to be losing height
And began shoving it down his throat with all his might
Then Bob felt something in his belly
That began to feel like he had eaten a bad gallon of jelly
Then be blew chunks on the nachos, on the table, on the telly
He blew on the bar, the wall, and a couple who would be identified by dental records as Michelle Pfeiffer and her husband David Kelly
Then Bob took a seat
And dabbed his mouth to be neat
Then began eating again saying he had a time to beat
And soon had his free meal because everyone fled out the door in fear of a repeat
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