Pocket's Thank You Notes

I would like to take this time to say some thank yous.

Thank you, to my parents for working on their dexterity.  I like to be scratched softly and slowly; River likes to be scratched firmly and quickly.  While dual petting my parents have trouble going fast with one hand and slow with the other, but thanks to hard work and some training they can now do it easily.

Thank you, Kellyanne Conway, for bringing “alternative facts” into the mainstream.  We dogs, after something in our houses, become chewed, destroyed, or broken, have presented “alternative facts” blaming “sum udder dawg” for the carnage.  Now “alternative facts” are part of the public lexicon and our lives have become better.

Thank you, not, to the Patriots, for going to another Super Bowl, which not only will give me a Sunday full of tension and yelling but will interrupt my viewing of Queen Victoria on Masterpiece Theater.  I take my English heritage very seriously.  

Thank you, to all my friends who take the time to read our blogs and leave such wonderful comments.  If friends were kibble, we would be morbidly obese.  I hope we are as good to you as you are to us.

Thank you, to the grammar program my parents invested in so I no longer have to worry about commas, periods or any of those other troublesome little marks that make writing less fun.

Thank you, to the treadmill that arrived at our house so my mom can go on walks without leaving the house.  No thank you to the treadmill that needed to be put together by my dad causing him to use what Enzo’s mom calls Non-Lutheran words.  

Thank you, my morning cornflakes.  I don’t know if they are good for me, and I only get a couple, but they are like a morning appetizer.  Someday I am going to open my breakfast place with morning appetizers and make lots of kibbles.

Thank you, my small bladder.  It causes me to go outside more, and every time I go out, I get a bacon treat.  You know who does not have to pee a lot?  Camels.  And they spit on humans.  If they peed more often and got treats, there would be less spitting, and a world with less spitting is a better place.

Most of all thank you all for taking the time to read this.  I appreciate your time.