Thursday, January 2, 2020

Never Trust A Green Man by Pocket Dog

 When  Mommy went out with her daughter on Monday, leaving Daddy home alone with us, the Christmas decorations were still up.  She asked Daddy not to touch them until she got home. Technically, he obeyed. But, by the time Mommy got back, all the decorations were gone:  Maybe for good.

Five minutes after Mommy left, there was a knock on the door.  A green man with curly feet and slight facial hair stood on the other side.  He introduced himself as T. Grinch, Christmas consultant. He told Daddy he was offering a free service to people in the neighborhood.  He would inspect all the Christmas decorations and give us a report on how to improve them for next year.  

River and I didn’t trust this guy, and we growled.  Daddy allowed the man into our house and threatened to crate us if we were not quiet.  Poor Daddy, he is an excellent judge of dogs but not of people.  

The man produced a red sack.  “When I was outside, I saw the two star-showers you have shining on the house and trees.  The lights are getting dim. The garland on the light pole is worn, and one of the lights you have wrapped around the pole was out.    Let me take these back to the shop where I can fix them.” Daddy did nor want to have a dim star-shower or droopy garland, so he agreed.

The man stopped in the kitchen.  He saw the balls hanging from the sunlight, the Christmas hand towels on the stove, and a stuffed snowman on the refrigerator.  “Marvelous,” T, Grinch said. “So tastefully done. But, some of these balls have lost their luster, and the snowman could use to be restuffed.  Let me take these back to the shop where I can fix them.” River and I tried to bark no, but Daddy wasn’t listening.  

He walked into the front room and picked up one of the dancing, singing stuffies that Mommy had put in the front windows.  “Those are fine; it’s just that the batteries don’t work.” T Grinch said he would take care of that and stuffed them into his bag and threw in the electric candles too without mentioning what was wrong with them.

He walked into the living room, where we had the brand new tree.  Certainly, he could not find anything wrong with it. “Very, very nice,” T. Grinch said feeling the branches. 

 “This is going to last a long time.” I was very relieved to hear this. I would hate to lose our new tree. “Have you had it, raincoated?” he asked.

Daddy asked him what that was.  “That protects the branches. These will dry out over a year or two, and then one night, you turn out the lights and bam! The whole place goes up.”

“I don’t want that!” Daddy said.

“Let me take the tree for you.  I will get it raincoated and have it right back for you.” the man said.  

“Do you want us to remove the ornaments?”

“That’s okay I will buff them up for you.  You don’t want a new tree and dim ornaments.”  Then the man grabbed the rest of our decorations.  “All this stuff should be shined up. You are going to have the best Christmas decorations on the block next year.  You are going to win a contest.”

River and I tried to run under the man’s legs and trip him.  We knew Mommy would be mad when she got home, and the decorations were gone.  But the man deftly moved around us. He went outside, threw the bag in a sled, and disappeared down the road. 
Daddy got our leashes and took us out to do our business.  Mr. Walker from across the street stopped by, and warned us that the Grinch was in town looking to steal Christmas decorations.  He showed Daddy a picture, and of course, it was the man.  
When Mommy came home, Daddy first said he took down the decorations for her and then said he gave them to the Little Sisters of the Poor.  It shouldn’t take long for Mommy to find

If any of you see a decorated tree with a picture ornament featuring me let me know.    After getting Santa in trouble, I am desperately trying to save next Christmas.

And no matter the season, don’t let the Grinch in your door.  

6 comments:

  1. We know him, his first name is The and he is not to be trusted. Your Daddy is in Big Trouble for being so trusting. He should learn to listen to you guys.

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  2. Oh mom isn't going to be happy about this. If you have a dog house move out so daddy can move in. Just saying.

    Have a fabulous day. ♥

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  3. That's for the warning, our Dad sure would be in trouble if that happened here!

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  4. Was there a smallish, hungry dog pulling the sled? Were you dreaming? Is the Grinch green like asparagus or green like curly kale? Did you call the police dogs? XOX Xena and Lucy

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