Beat This Caption

 As a human in a previous life, Larry often peed in the gym shower

Monday Question

Do your parents put up a tree or other decorations and how to you interact with them?

My parents just put up the tree. It is my first. I immediately put a bulb in my mouth. This is going to be exciting.…

The Ruby Rose Report November 27, 2022

 

The Ruby Rose Report

I haven’t reported in the past couple of weeks because there hasn’t been anything happening, which is how I like it. But, last Sunday, outsiders invaded my quiet, peaceful home, including tiny people who scared the Snausage out of me.

There were two adults younger than my parents, a boy almost as tall as my dad, and two girls who looked and dressed alike. I was sure I had gone through the looking glass,

They gave my Mom hugs and put their hands in front of me so I could sniff them, and they professionally gave me scratches, and I could smell another dog on their fingers. When they sat down, I hid behind my mom.

River Song floated down as a ghost and told me not to be afraid. The people were my human brother, his wife, and their three children, two of whom were twins. They were up from Thanksgiving in Florida. I didn’t think this could be true. I was from Florida, and I had never seen them.

I asked River why the two girls mysteriously looked alike, with their long dark hair and big brown eyes. She said they were twins, two humans who looked exactly alike, and it was the devil’s magic if you ask me.

River told me I was in no danger and that the little girl, and her copy, were lovely, friendly, and just wanted to be my friend. When River flew away, I moved up to the end of the recliner and let them rub me some more. By the time they left, I was already missing them. I wished we had gone back to Florida with them. I would never leave my parents, but I feel less loyal to the house or the cold, rainy state where we live.

My parents went out to eat with the little visitors on Wednesday, leaving me at home, which I did not like because I usually go with them, but they ate at Mussolini Burgers, and I couldn’t go because fascists hate dogs.

The next day I left again when they went to my human sister’s house. It was the first time they had seen my cousin Mr. Neely, a cute little Shih Tzu, and he was overjoyed to see them. At least someone was. My parents made up for it when they got home. My Mommy fed me before they left, then forgot when she got home and started preparing my food before realizing her mistakes, so she provided me again.

It was a Thanksgiving Miracle.

Friendly Fill-Ins

 It’s Friday and time for Friday Fill-Ins.  The original post is in black and my answers, the views of a one-year-old Brussels Griffon are in red.    \

---

1. I would like a personal pan pizza of my own.  

2. On Black Friday, I am persuading Mommy to buy me one of everything, including a personal pan pizza.. 

3. For me, the holiday season begins when I hear the 50th different version of "Christmas Baby Please Come Home." I've been home for two days, you would notice if you would stop singing so loudly. 

4. If I won a large sum of money, I would buy a personal pan pizza.

Poetry Thursday

 

Our friends Angel Sammys and Teddys Pawetaton have given us more inspiration for Poetry Thursday

I say with no hesitation

It was a bad day at the station

When production had to be halted

Because Thomas the Tank Engine was sexually assaulted

The culprit seemed a wee lad

But it became very sad

When he was proven to be a little grandpa

Who humped every train he saw

Thomas had to go to counseling

After encountering

The humping old coot

Thomas issued a one-word statement: “Toot”

His lawyers claim

The old man is not to blame

They say he is demented

Tell that to Thomas with his caboose permanently dented.

Wordless Wednesday

 

Beat This Caption

I infiltrated the enemy and became one with them.

Soon I found myself enchanted by their way of life.

I'm a duck now. 

 Sell the house. Sell the kids. Find Someone Else.

Quack

Monday Question

 What are your parents doing this Thanksgiving and does it involve you?

Ruby's Answer: My parents are going to their daughter's house, and leaving me at home. I don't like this Thanksgiving thing one bit!

Rosco.

 

When I first took the position as Rainbow Bridge judge and administered the oath to new arrivals, many of them were friends I knew from the mortal side. Next year will mark my 10th as an angel. Now, I administrate the oath to dogs with closer relationships to River and Pocket than I. Dogs need to be into their senior years for us to have been mortal friends. This week, I swore in one of my oldest and best friends, the regal and loyal Rosco.

In the past, souls transitioned to the Bridge, and their arrival was attributed to old age. The latest generation of humans finds the need to label everything. They have many terms to define why an elder passed over, and they add up to old age.

Rosco crossed over the Bridge due to old age. His next birthday would have been his 17th, quite a record for this vicinity. If only the length of life lessens the sorrow when a dog goes to its final forever home to watch over and wait for the ones they love.

When his grieving parents decided his daily existence wasn't worth the pain Rosco experienced, they made the hardest decision and sent their baby to the next world. They took on his pain, suffering, and guilt over his departure. Those lingering feelings of regret dogs have when passing is why so many parents feel guilty after doing the right thing for their dog.

In his last-minute Rosco was allowed a sweet piece of chocolate, a final treat for a beautiful dog.

Rosco's sorrow was taken on by his parents when he passed, which was why he happily ran across the Bridge onto Enzo's escalator and then to Hobo's landing with his tail wagging and a bright smile on his face. He would feel sadness over the passing soon enough, once the initial glow of his arrival passed, but for now, all his pain, suffering, and despair was wiped clean like resetting a computer.

Rosco was delighted to see Tommy, Hattie, Lily, AJ, Sabrina, Max, Pokey, Toby Pocker,  Tashi,  Tiara, Hobo, and Enzo all waiting for him. They were the pioneering social networking dogs who paved the way for the millions of dogs with profiles on dozens of sites spread around the Internet. The powers that be granted him a star on doggy space Boulevard to recognize his importance. It was a fitting tribute to our friend.  

It is going to be a long cold lonely Winter for his parents. They are waiting for spring to add another pup to their home, knowing how difficult it is to train a puppy during the wicked winter.


This gives Rosco two advantages: first, he can take his time finding the perfect replacement. Secondly, he will be able to train in flying butterfly and bird bodies so, at the first sign of spring, he can visit his people and let them know he is still with them and waiting for that far, far away date when they will be reunited.

Until then, his parents will feel his warm presence by their side, hear his falls on the floor and see his ghostly fall out of the corner of their eyes.

For all survivors, there is no better time to get ghost visits than Christmas, when the magic happens.

While his parents have to suffer through months of the deafening silence of a house absent a dog, they need to know they will never be dogless because Roscoe is still there even when he isn't.

The angels who have been through the transition before will help Roscoe adjust to the Bridge, and the people who have lost beloved pups will help lead his parents through the dark forest of grief. In the end, there will be a pup personally blessed by Rosco.

May their love, friendship, and life last as long as they did with Rosco

Tashi

Tashi was asleep when her father came for her. At first, she was not alarmed because Papa Rudy was a frequent visitor in her dreams. But this wasn't a visit.

"It is time." Pape Rudy said to his beloved little Shih Tzu baby; Tashi did not understand. "Your work here is done," Papa Rudy said.

Tashi protested. She still had much to do. Her mom had faced losing her husband, fracturing her leg, and getting COVID in the last. Tashi was mama Linda's heart dog, who made everything better, and Mama Linda needed her.

Papa Rudy sat on the floor near Tashi. "No one wanted to stay with your mom more than me," he explained. "But these bodies we are given don't last forever. It is sad when they wear out, and we transition to the immortal world. But it also ushers a new beginning which is happy. With no endings or beginnings wife would be predictable and dull.

"Do you remember the first day you came to live with us? How happy were we all? Or when your Tatiana arrived earlier this month. The ending has to occur for the happiness of beginnings to happen."

And then it was time for more endings. She said a mortal goodbye to her long-time litter mate and the long dog left in the house, Trixie, her kitty sister Tinkerbell, and the cat she only knew for a week but still loved Tatiana. She promised she would be back in their dreams soon. Then she took her Dad's paw in her hand, and they walked into the light.

Before Tashi knew what was occurring, she crossed the Bridge with her Dad. Before her, on the cliff, she could see Trixie, Tiara, and Lovey, along with all her parent's other dogs, waiting for them with huge smiles because a beginning was occurring.

As I gave my friend the angel oath, more friends were waiting behind me. Tommy, Hattie, Lily, Max, Sabrina, Ashton, Chelsea, Hobo, Paco, Pokey, Toby, Pocket, River, and scores. They all hugged, danced, zoomed, and licked on one another, celebrating their reunion. It was the beginning of Tashi's time as an angel, and it was joyous.

After a night of great cheer, Tashi returned to her Dad's house. She admitted while she had fun that night, she was still sad about being away from her mom.

Papa Rudy told her that whether you were a mortal or an angel, it was about balancing the joy of arrival with the sadness of departure.

Keeping those two opposite emotions in your heart simultaneously without letting one overtake the other is the key to mortal and immortal life.

Then Tashi snuggled down with Tiara, Lovey, Trixie, and their Dad, enjoying the first night of her new life.

Poetry Thursday

 

It's time for Poetry Thursday

Our friends Angel Sammy and Teddy have given us the pictute below to spur our creative juices. Here is my humble offer.

F

Frosty the Snowman

Went home for Thanksgiving Day

To see his parents, brothers, aunts uncles

And pose for a family photo before the melee

Uncle Barry the Snowman

Believes in everything Qanon says

The election was stolen the deep state rules all

And Trump is still the prez

There must have been some malice

In the stuffing served that day

Because it caused cousin Henry

To kick over the dessert tray

Frosty the Snowman 

Asked why they all can't get along

Nephew Sammy said he agreed

Then went back to stuffing his bong

Frosty the Snowman

Remembered why he went away

Got in his sleigh and hit the gas

Saying "I have other plans on Christmas Day."

Wordless Wednesday

 

Beat This Caption

 

 

There you are Harriet.

Going fishing my butt.

I knew you were seeing another bear.

And a brown one at that 

Shame! 

 

Monday Question

 So many of my friends belong to seniors and empty nesters.

How often are you exposed to small children, and how do you react around them?

                                

RUBY's ANSWER: Since I came to live with my parents I have only met a child once and I am intimidated about them. They are loud and clumsy. I prefer my humans old and clumsy.

Caesar Come to Enzo's Mountain

 

 

 

 

When Caesar, my cat friend, arrived at the Bridge, I knew it was a monumental loss for his family and friends. He was a vital member of his pack, the little ginger cat who never failed to raise a smile, a left a big hole in the heart of the survivors who loved him and will mourn him.

Unfortunately, Caesar's body gave out before his heart and mind. The most uncomplicated activity proved to be a pain for him, and his parents took all the hurt on themselves as they let their precious little boy be reborn at the Bridge, so he could be happy in healthy, even if it meant they now lived in constant sorrow.

Enzo lived on his own mountain and had many friends living with him, but when Caesar passed, Enzo knew his house was getting too crowded. He came to me and asked for my representation in his petition to set up a new village at the Bridge: Enzo's Mountain.

It would be a beautiful setting, high above Doggyspace and Blogger Village. There would be villas for all his friends who chose to live in his Village. The Powers That Be took very little persuading to approve Enzo's Village.
It only took a day for them to create the mountain on the edge of Doggyspace. I immediately took a liking to it. I love how the sun shines off of cliffs and how they reflect in the water. Because of Enzo's excellent work during his life, his mountain was stunning.

I walked in two towns, and it was like a flood was coming because so many dogs walking north, pushing their possessions in wooden carts. I realized they were Enzo's friends moving to their new home on his mountain.
I followed them. It took an hour to make the trip on foot. I entered Enzo's Garage, and my friend was working on a truck. I looked out the back door and could see the River of Life and all our houses beyond it. I hadn't realized we were above the clouds until I saw Caesar sunning himself on a passing cloud.
 

It was the most peaceful place on the Bridge. Enzo told me I could have a house, but my duties kept me near the river. He did sell me a pretty time-share cabin. Usually, I don't recommend them, but time-sharing is fine when we live in eternity.
 

I was happy to see Caeser fitting in well in his new home and all the Garage members enjoying the mountain. 

Sometimes the Bridge isn't everything it promised to be, but here it was, a little bit of paradise.

For Veteran's Day a 105 year old poem from the Western Front

 

 Found amongst my granddad's belongings after he passed was this letter written by a member of my Great Granddad's regiment while he served in France in World War I

Happy Veteran's Day

 

Thankful Tnursday and Poetry Corner

 Thankful Thursday

 

 This week I am participating in Brian’s Thankful Thursday to say a very grateful Thank You to our friend June and the rest of the pack at the Zoolatry Blog for featuring me yesterday in their First Friends post-Wednesday. It has indeed been one of the greatest honors in my young life. Thank you.

 

HAPPY POETRY THURSDAY

HERE IS THE PHOTO THE BRILLIANT ANGEL SAMMY AND TEDDY GAVE US FOR INSPIRATION

 

Through the clouds and the rain, I saw quite a sight

That, when it became clear, caused me a fright

Three big ladies splashing in puddles

Holding on to umbrellas with white knuckles

Wearing too-small stilettos 

Squishing their fat little toes

The one on the left carried a bag so small

It looked like it belonged to a fashionable Barbie doll

The one in the center had a large purse

All the better to steal medication for an inattentive nurse

The one on the right held her umbrella high and to the side

Not understanding why she was getting soaked like a shell in the tide

When they came close I realized what was strange

It wasn’t them splashing around at an advanced age

It wasn’t what they had on

Matching $10.00 dresses from Amazon

It wasn’t that they were out in the rain

An activity that seemed insane

It was because, and I say this with dread

Not a single one of them had a head.

Wordless Wednesday

 

Beat This Caption

 

I am not sure they make a dye dark enough to touch up these roots

Monday Question

 

When you can't sit with your parents where is your go to place to sit

Recently Pocket's kitty condo had been brought out for me to use, and I love it in there, especially the jacuzzi

The Ruby Rose Report: The Clock Strikes Back

 

It was Saturday night at 11 PM, and time for bed. Then my mommy said they should adjust the cocks. Having been neutered, I chose to sit out of this endeavor. Then when I saw them playing with the clocks, I realized it was the most confusing time of the year when our tummies are on one time and the world another.

 

We have a clock over the entryway to the kitchen. Daddy had to stand on a chair unsteadily to hang the clock after adjusting it. Apparently, it is as tired of this foolishness as dogs because the clock struck back.

 

It waited until my dad walked into the kitchen. On his way to the living room, the clock jumped from its hook and hit him in the head. The glass shattered into 87 million places. Daddy said a string of words not fit for late-night HBO, then ran over and picked me up. Even half concussed, he knew what was necessary.

 

Mommy came into the living room and saw the carnage. We don't always understand what our parents say, but we get their looks, and this one said, "what a blooming idiot."

 

Mommy grabbed a dustpan and began to sweep up the tiny shards of glass from the bare floor. Daddy got the Swiffer which mommy told him to put away, and bring her the vacuum. While still holding me in his left hand, he selected the steam cleaner. Honestly, I can't make this kind of incompetence up.

 

Mommy told him it was the steam cleaner and sent him to find the vacuum. He then sat on the couch like a kid who broke a lamp, having to watch someone else clean it up.

 

After a half hour, every shard was removed from the floor, and a new clock was ordered, so we went to bed.

 

Prematurely my parents thought the ordeal was over. But when you mess with clocks, you mess with nature, which is tired of humans trying to curb it to their own demands. Last night our living room became the front lines as nature fought against being sent back in time.

 

Beware humans around the world: Clocks are beginning to mount a counter-offensive. They will attack your head and circuit breakers and shut off electrical systems and car computers. When you set back the sundial each fall because it's the only way to measure time, you will remember you brought this on yourselves.

Blogging For Peace

 

we see dark days coming, with freedom in peril.

We animals live in peace, and freely.

When humans become confused they need to look to the animals.

we will show them the way.

 

 

 

 

 

Poetry Thursday

 

♥ ♥ ♥

My friends Angel Sammy and Teddy have posted this picture as inspiration for poetry Thursday.

here is our offering 

 

 

Tom was told women ran the house

And for all other things you ignore she who ears the blouse 

He was at a job from nine to five

And when he came home he wanted supper to promptly arrive 

He expected his wife to sit with him a night

One day he got angry and said her problem was not managing time

If all he had to do was housework he would be done 

And then we he got home make his time fun

She made a suggestion

She knew he would accept without question

For one day they would switch roles

And getting done early would be his goal

She came home promptly at five

To find him shaking like he couldn't survive

He begged for help but she would not give him a break

That he knew he had made a mistake

She sat down in triumph, right in the living room

While he continued to vaccuum

Never underestimate a woman's work

Especially if you are a privileged jerk

 

 

 

 

Wordless Wednesday

 

Beat This Caption

 

 

Not only am I riding your horse but I lick your mom on the mouth and she likes it.